Candles
I sti and stare at your photo on a monitor in the middle of 5 other screens. A wall of displays, mixed with wiring, lighting, speakers and a dozen other things plugged in. A world of over complicated electronic stuff. A world I would not know without you. Days go by, and as my heart continues to beat, my life has continued on. Sadly without you. And at times among things I do I find myself using the saying " my Grampa would have loved this! ", or I need to know something and I pick up the phone, then put it down. As I have no one to call, Not even a number remains now. I can't just show up out there, as your place is no longer your place. I struggle with what to do. But I get by on the courage, education, and the "give-it-a-go" you provided me with. Albeit, sometimes the order changes. As sometimes after a bandaid or a replacement of an electrically melted tool occurs. A re-evaluation is required. Did you know you can weld with golf cart batteries? Yes we did, we both did. Yet 5 min later after that conversation we both managed to forget that and make one hell of a light show while running wiring for the new lights that we were installing in the new cart. Shockingly once the smoke cleared and with memory in hand all of a sudden, we shared a massive ooops laugh. That mistake was not made again.
But its these memories that keep me going. Dangerous and funny, we learned together. I wouldn't want it any other way. Death being inevitable, and resistance futile. I knew this day would come sometime, because I knew exactly how hard it was going to be. But it didn't make it any easier. The kids miss you, I miss you.