Obituary of Roger and Hilda Triffo

ROGER and HILDA TRIFFO We are not all destined to go through life as respectable citizens. Many grow up on the fringes, deep in the shadows. Roger was a drug addict and paranoid schizophrenic, his mother Hilda a lifelong alcoholic. Together this odd pair lived a life. Roger briefly joined society when he fell hard for a blonde bombshell, the head cheerleader; she was several classes above his own, they married Oct 6, 1962. He graduated from university with a BA in business Admin in 1969 and they had four children. Soon after the birth of the fourth child in 1970, Roger would fall from reality, never to return. His mother Hilda loved once. Martin was a tall man who looked handsome in his WW2 uniform. Hilda and Martin were deeply in love before he heard the call and joined up. Their passionate relationship continued through the war. During leave, Martin came home for a few weeks to his “darling Hilda.” Martin returned overseas, 9 months later, Roger was born. Martin finished his tour, came home and married another, never seeing Hilda again. For Roger, this meant growing up without a father. Hilda was left to fend for herself and her son through the 50 and 60’s, an era unfriendly to unwed mothers. Hilda never married; she continued to self-medicate throughout her life, alcohol her constant companion. Roger’s “normal life” was short lived, just eight years. He left his wife and children in 1970, never to return. Mental illness would taunt him to the end. Roger and Hilda represent the struggle many face just to get through a day. It is hard to imagine that for a large portion of the world, life sucks much of the time. Hilda and Roger were dished out a particularly large serving of suck, yet they never lost their humanity. They were not saints, far from it, but at their core, they were not mean or vindictive, they were not spiteful or hateful, they were not racist or homophobic, and that is something. I am Roger’s son and Hilda’s grandson. I am not mean or vindictive, I’m not spiteful or hateful nor am I a racist or a homophobe, and that is something. The world could use a little more Roger and Hilda. Roger is survived by four children and seven grandchildren. Roger Triffo died October 10, 2013 and Hilda Triffo died April 12, 2002. They will be buried together in the summer of 2014. By Christopher Triffo @CSTriffo.