Obituary of Ilona Eva Ebergenyi

ILONA died peacefully on December 12, 2014 at 3am. After many years of COPD, she died while sleeping in her bed. She leaves her daughter Eva and grandson Dave. Cremation in December 2014. Memorial Service will be held at Knox-Metropolitan United Church, 2340 Victoria Avenue, Regina, SK on Monday, January 19, 2015 at 1:30 p.m.

For 85 years this lovely lady graced us with her presence. Starting in her home town of Hajdudorog December 1, 1929 born to Anthony and Maria Gunban a tiny healthy little baby girl.

Our earliest picture is of her as a young woman of 16. She met and married Pista but he died in a mandatory army training. After several years she met Laszlo Ebengenyi and they married April 1953 and 10 months later gave birth to her daughter Eva Maria Magdolna Ebengenyi.

She went to school and the Greek Catholic Church in her home town. Growing to a lovely 5’4” tall young lady 100 lbs. She maintained her slimness claiming that she could never swallow so much as another bite of food once she was full. Despite her being a great cook and baker she never veered from her eating limits.

She started smoking at 19 and would continue to battle to quit smoking till 85. In 65 years the cigarettes had become more addictive and pneumonia ravaged her small form for over the past 40 years of her life.

Never to give up she fought back with vigor and aplomb. She used her gardening skills, did herbal remedies and exercised to counter the illnesses.

In her small town she learned country living spending time with her brothers Miklos and Imre going about on field trips of their making. Imre and her remained best friends till he died after a brief illness in his 80’s.

She moved to Budapest and tried office work and hated it. So she learned to drive and fix cars to become a chauffer. And for several years traveled across Europe as a private chauffer to a company executive. She hated being idle so while waiting she would crochet new doily patterns to fill the time and to give as presents.

She had good friends and they would go for coffee, to theaters and dancing. She even won for dancing with a wooden spoon.

She had a great friend in Dora and Imre married her so the family unit was torn apart when Ilona and her daughter left for Canada in October 1963. Shortly upon her arrival in Canada she had an appendectomy. This was as painful as her emotional pain at the physical distance of 5,000 miles to Budapest.

Budapest, Hungary in 1963 was both beautiful and in a temperate climate in Central Europe. Ilona lived and worked in Budapest in close relations to her friends and family, easy access to travel throughout the city and country. City of 5 million people. October 1963 she left Budapest with her daughter to join her husband Laszlo in Esterhazy, SK population, 4000 people. The climate was colder and harsher.

Laszlo had just started working at the IMC Potash mine in 1962. He had built a trailer which was not complete yet upon Ilona’s arrival. So for a week they stayed with the Chisnadiak family who spoke Hungarian and were friends till they moved away.

Life was different. Ilona did not speak English, neither did her daughter. But while her daughter went to school she went shopping and amazed her neighbours as she navigated speaking to the Russian butcher in one language and him another, but still got her shopping done.

Gone were the days of easy access to stores, coffee shops and transportation. They had only one car, so she had to walk mostly everywhere. She quickly adapted to her new life and kept her family healthy and happy with her cooking, cleaning, baking, gardening and preserving.

In the long winter evenings the family took up doing tapestry work. However, Ilona also did other crafts, knitting, crochet and sewing to fill in for their needs. She became the practice your Hungarian go to person for her neighbours who spoke little Hungarian. She listened to the TV and radio to learn English and already the first week embarked on reading English armed with a dictionary.

Life settled into a routine for the next nine years. She continued her homemaking and added other skills to her talents including a class in making footstools.

In February and March she would start the seedlings and by spring she would put in a huge garden along with fruit bushes and flowers. As the months flew by she would harvest and preserve much of the fruits and vegetables extending the budget so other necessities could be purchased. Laszlo continued to work many long hours at the mine on shift work; each shift setting a different flavour, or lack thereof for the family. Night shift meant that you had to tiptoe around as Laszlo had to sleep during the day.

In 1973 Ilona’s daughter graduated, then married in 1974 and had a son David in 1977. Due to medical complications, Ilona stepped in and while her daughter recovered, she brought her grandson to live with them in Esterhazy.

Once again, Ilona donned the role of mother and for many years, David lived with her and Laszlo. David moved to Regina to start Grade 10 but soon after finishing High School he returned to live with his Grandparents, Ilona and Laszlo.

Ilona began to go to Bingo at the Esterhazy Legion Hall in 1964. It was held every Thursday and because she won fairly frequently, she was encouraged to attend often.

With some friends from playing Bingo, like Margaret Bigalow, they began travelling to nearby towns such as Yarbo and Yorkton. Soon the Metis Bingo opened in Esterhazy so the whole family went there.

Population in Esterhazy did not increase much. The area had mostly farmers and miners and some who did both.

Laszlo loved fishing, hunting and boating to this end he took his family, and Mom, being good natured, pitched in and the outings were fun. Luckily Laszlo found male friends to go hunting with including Dennis Dancsok and on their farm he built a little smoke house to cure the deer meat they wanted to preserve.

Ilona started smoking at 19 and tried to quit many times however Laszlo also smoked so the pattern of trying to quit continued off and on even into October 2014.

The smoking and sipping a cup of coffee all day was her mainstay. The habit weakened her immune system and soon in the 1980’s she would get a cold and it would progress from cold to bronchitis to pneumonia. By 1990 it went from a cold straight to pneumonia. She started to cough more and more.

Never a person to stay idle. Ilona and Laszlo started learning about growing herbs to remedy many ills. Their health improved and as their grandson grew they were both able to attend David’s 1995 high school convocation at the Turvey Centre. And their daughter’s University of Regina convocation for BA ordinary in Geography.

The proud parents had their joy over shadowed as soon after Laszlo retired he had a series of surgeries, back surgery, then hip replacement, then back surgery again. To both Ilona and Laszlo’s disappointment their lives was not now a life of leisure and travel, but of long painful hospital visits and slow recoveries for Laszlo.

Ilona did go on a few tours to Europe and her companion was Anne Dancsok. They not only travelled but roomed together.

In 2005 life for Laszlo came to an abrupt halt as after a massive heart attack the hospital staff could not help him. He had a ‘sport' heart which means from years of hard work his heart was larger and weaker as once it filled with blood it could not start again.

Ilona’s traditional marriage meant that as Laszlo lay in hospital she was left to pick up the financial ball. After his death she continued to live in Esterhazy until 2007, when pneumonia landed her in a Yorkton hospital. She knew she had food allergies but now she was getting sick from medications. She had to delay her move till she sold their house.

She moved to Regina into the Heritage a Regina Housing Unit four blocks from her daughter, close to downtown and two busses to her door.

She had been to Regina to visit so knew Centennial Bingo and the next 8 years she attended bingo regularly.

She found that the COPD made her cough so much she was exhausted and the bingo was a good distraction especially when she won. She had many friends there. Some like one dark haired lady – Mary, who died of stomach cancer, was sick then gone.

Ilona had a wonderful attitude and outlook on life. She continued to grow plants in her living room window, and to use herbs to heal her lesser ailments.

Several years she spent at the General Hospital with pneumonia. One such time she took ill and we called Elsie to take us to the hospital, we got there just in time. Elsie had for a time took her to bingo, shopping and the casino. Before Ilona died she asked Elsie, ‘Why do I have to spend my birthday’s in the hospital.”

The food at the hospital was gross. But this last time Ilona could barely eat because it took her so much effort to just breath.

In 1976 Ilona won a red Firebird. It was a five dollar pack Western ticket and in the pack another ticket won $1,000.00. Good for Mom! In the following years the car proved invaluable to the family as Dad retired there was not budget for another car.

She was a gracious lady to the end. As she pointed out to me, ‘Look how well they take care of me - General Unit 5E!” Thanks.